45 Wedding Don’ts That Will Quickly Turn The Special Day Into A TrainwreckBy Aileen D
Weddings are supposed to be a day of celebration. Two people declare that they will spend their lives together in the presence of loved ones. But, with such a big occasion, something is bound to happen. Whether it’s an uninvited guest or bad cake, the endeavor of planning and executing a wedding is a stressful venture.
You can check every box on the list, but you will never be able to accommodate every guest. And if you make this a priority, your big day will eventually turn into a train wreck. This can go many ways, from people having the nerve to propose at the wedding to kids throwing tantrums during the wedding vows and stealing the bride and groom’s limelight. Oh, the drama! Just how many things could go wrong during this momentous event?
As we said, minor mishaps are unavoidable. And unfortunately, there are always those that will go so far as to do something downright inappropriate or impolite. That’s why we took the liberty to compile some of the worst mistakes guests have made at weddings. Let this be a lesson in wedding etiquette.
Wanting To Say Her Vows
Some well-meaning people invite their exes to their weddings. But here is why you might want to think twice about that. One man recalls being hit on by his ex while his bride was speaking to the guests. Did we read that right?
The guy didn’t even budge. He told his ex, “Um…nope,” and had a laugh about it with his wife. We get that a wedding might make people consider an alternate future with an ex and what could have been, but don’t dig up buried hatchets.
Not Letting The Bride And Groom Eat
Of course, we want to greet the newlyweds with good wishes. But that doesn’t mean we should rudely interrupt them while eating. Enjoy the music and let them eat in peace. You can raise a toast after you see them mingling with the guests.
They have been up since three am making last-minute checks of the wedding details. She was getting her hair and makeup done while he was checking to see if his best man had the ring. This is the first time they might have anything to scarf down.
Playing A “Little” Joke
It’s normal to see the bride and groom a bit jittery for the big day. But don’t expect that everyone will react the same way. When this woman was having her hair done, her hairdresser thought it would be a good idea to play a joke on her.
This hairdresser said that the bride-to-be had lice. She kept doing her hair while the bride-to-be insisted that she didn’t have any. Finally, the hairdresser conceded. Some brides really do turn into bridezillas on their big day, even ignoring lice.
Not Keeping Away From The Babies
Unlike everyone else at the wedding, you can’t boss babies around. If they decide to pee, vomit, poop, and cry all over you, they will happily. Brides are warned not to pick them up or do so at their own risk.
Besides, it’s not like you wouldn’t have one of your own after the wedding. Just try to keep the gown clean and presentable until after the party. If you’re supposed to change into another outfit, then, by all means, carry that baby!
Stressing The Bride With Details
They may look like picturesque Barbie dolls, but brides are under immense pressure on their wedding day. So please, do them a favor and tell the wedding coordinator that whatever hitch happens on the big day, they are being paid to fix it.
You can share the stories and laugh at all the things that went wrong a couple of days after the wedding. But until then, let the bride and groom enjoy the moment. You don’t have to ruin their mood with trivial things when they’re on cloud nine.
Being A Drama Queen
We have heard many horror stories about guests wanting to be the drama queen on the big day. One woman begged her aunt to wear a white dress. Can you believe it? “Wear hot pink for all I care, just not white!” But did her aunt listen? No.
Another bride’s cousin drunkenly stormed into the reception and argued with her boyfriend in front of all the guests. Even the band couldn’t hear themselves playing their instruments over the sound of coarse screaming and swearing. Someone had to drive this woman and her boyfriend out of the party.
Unrelated Public Announcements
During the reception, make sure to make a toast to the newlyweds. Bid them long life, a healthy family, and a safe home. Don’t use this opportunity to make an unrelated public announcement, especially one that will cause food to fall out of people’s mouths. It can wait!
Because at Redditor’s Abetterway_ thisway’s wedding, his wife’s cousin took the mic and told everyone he was gay. It might have taken him a couple of champagne glasses to get to the point. Subsequently, his boyfriend, who hadn’t been invited, announced they were engaged.
Attention: All The Single Ladies
The bouquet toss is one of the highly anticipated events of the night. It’s the break to the lull during the reception when everyone is busy congratulating the newlyweds or stuffing cake down their throats. Ceremoniously, unmarried women can participate in it.
But just ask the DJ to keep from playing Beyonce’s Single Ladies. You don’t have to call female singletons to catch the bouquet. Some of them might actually prefer to savor their freedom. Besides, what did we say about public announcements that do not concern the bride and the groom?
Cheers To The… Err, Newly Proposed?
We cannot help but feel happy for the lovey-dovey bride and groom on their wedding day. But don’t make this day an opportunity to tell the world you’re getting hitched too! It doesn’t work that way. Wait for another suitable time.
Remember, it’s their day, not yours. So don’t force your partner to get down on one knee, pop a ring, and don’t even think about saying yes. We will request the DJ to shift the limelight to the bride and groom if you do so.
Mixing Pleasure With Business
There is a reason why only family is invited to the wedding and the reception. It’s a social event! It might be a while before the whole family comes together on a momentous occasion and celebrates the beginning of new marital life.
We have heard that some guests used the wedding to market themselves, and worse off, it had been a divorce attorney. It’s not the most likely scenario we want, especially when we’re seeing two people take a vow.
Throwing A Bachelorette Party On The Big Day
We get that you’ll be giving up many things when you get married. And having a bachelorette party is your last big chance to enjoy those forbidden fruits before getting hitched. Just make sure to enjoy the festivities before the wedding.
True story! Years ago, a man went into the men’s room to find a guy in a tux crying uncontrollably. He learned that the guy had been the groom and that he walked in on his bride and his best man getting it on. We think it’s time to call that divorce attorney now.
One Too Many Drinks
One of the things that we love about a wedding is the free-flowing champagne. You could have one, three, or as many as you like, but only so long as you can control yourself. There are definitely some guests you should keep your eye on.
It’s better to control the number of alcoholic drinks Nana consumes at the party. One glass of red wine is good for her heart, but two or more, and she’s bound to entertain everyone with the pranks you pulled off as a kid. We’re sure you wouldn’t want that.
Being Forced Into Marriage
We have heard many horror stories of people being forced into marriage out of tradition, family politics, or guaranteed child support. While saying your vows in front of everyone might help you save face, having the groom right “help me” on the sole of his shoes won’t.
Of course, this might have been a harmless joke. But at least let the bride in on it. No one wants to be the butt of the joke at their own wedding in front of family, friends, and loved ones. The Lord Almighty, as your witness, would be shaking His head with disapproval.
Keeping A List Of Gifts Owed
This isn’t The Godfather, and you’re far from Vito Corleone, who has a line of people offering gifts in exchange for a favor. Only invite people you would want to celebrate this special day with. Don’t invite them expecting to receive gifts.
You just might be sorely disappointed. We have heard that one bride had thought to invite nearly 300 guests, expecting she would receive roughly the same number of presents. But after the reception, there were only 20 gifts laid out on the table.
Not Dressing To Impress
There will be a lot of people to impress at social events like a wedding. So make sure to dress the part. Trust us, the bride and groom will thank you for attending their celebration shaven, invitation in hand, and with an ironed coat and tie.
Refrain from wearing your workboots, camouflage shirts, and pants. You won’t be playing airsoft at the wedding. Try to dress up for a change. Who knows? You just might land a date dressed as your best self during the special day.
Failing To Think It Through
Reddit user Pumpkin107 worked as a caterer for a while, during which he saw a lot of drama happening on wedding days. He had seen newlyweds opening envelopes to pay for the accommodations while the guests were in the room. And he saw a bride crying in the corner…
…regretting she had married the groom. Whereas before she was all-smiles saying her vows with utmost sincerity, now she was at a loss for words. It’s not like she can take those words back, can she? She has a lifetime ahead of regretting that decision.
Airing Dirty Laundry In Public
It’s a privilege having to be asked to stand as the best man. You were the one chosen out of all the people the newlyweds invited to the ceremony. So when you’re asked to raise a toast, keep the message light and hopeful.
Now isn’t the time to air the bride or groom’s dirty laundry in public. You could have a laugh or a stumble here and there, but don’t go publicizing the trenches they dug themselves into. There are some things best left in the past.
Staying In Virtual Reality
It’s an important day! Everyone is excited to take pictures of the bride and groom as they say their vows. But remember to keep your phones away during the solemnities. You don’t have to do a live stream of the ceremony.
And remember to put your phone on silent or on airplane mode. No one wants to hear your phone ring just after the priest asks the bride and groom if they want to take the other as their lawfully wedded partner. Don’t kill the vibe!
Sharing the Limelight
If you’re lucky enough, you will only get married once in your lifetime. This is the first, and the last time you will take your solemn vows in front of everyone. So please, let the newlyweds bask in the moment while it lasts. Let them have the limelight.
While the newlyweds value your attendance at this important event, it doesn’t mean that they have to share the limelight with you. They shouldn’t have to worry about you drawing attention from them, like, say, announcing your lgbtq+ status. Come out after the wedding.
Using It As A Dating Opportunity
We all have needs. But don’t seek to fulfill those needs during a wedding. A lot of people were sorely disappointed when they came to the wedding, rubber in hand, only to find out that 99.9% of the people who attended were couples.
The other percent? Oldies. Don’t use a wedding as an opportunity to date or to get laid. You and your buds could have done this during the bachelor and bachelorette party, but not now. Tame your inner bunny until after the ceremonies.
Refusing To Pay For A Babysitter
There’s a new hype going on. Apparently, some people are hosting child-free weddings. That means that you aren’t allowed to bring your kids to the wedding or the reception dinner. So if you do RSVP to attend, make sure to hire a babysitter.
Reddit user mossybunny was bummed out that a couple brought their kid to a childless wedding. She had informed everyone, but this lone couple decided to turn up with their baby. Instead of a celebratory mood, some parents were sulky that their kids weren’t allowed to the event. Yikes!
Ripping Giftpaper Apart
This is a definite no-no. Do not go around opening the bride and the groom’s gifts. This isn’t an airport and whatever you are doing is far from a security check. Don’t ruin the surprise for the newlyweds, or worse, steal from them after they invited you.
Reddit user GeneticsGuy attended a wedding where the groom’s sister and mother were manning a table. They opened every card as soon as the gifts were handed, checking to see if there were cash or gift cards. They took note of who gave gifts and what they gave.
Hawaiian Pizza For Chad
We shouldn’t have to say this, but we’re including it on the list just so we’re clear. Don’t order pizza. In fact, don’t have food delivered to the reception if the bride and groom have engaged the services of a catering company.
They have gone to great lengths to decide what their guests will eat. You can inform them or the wedding organizer what you’re allergic to, so they can choose other dishes instead. But you shouldn’t insult the caterers by ordering out.
Forced Display Of Affection
Of course, the newlyweds are madly in love and are probably itching to get rid of the attire and into the …err, next part of the ceremonies, but don’t expect them to be hyped up from start to finish. They will get tired sooner or later.
Like normal people are, when under stress or from lack of sleep, they may not feel the mood to kiss in front of everyone. So please don’t raise a toast and demand that the newlyweds publicly display their affection. Let them have at it from the comforts of their room.
A No-Show After Saying Yes!
The bride and the groom will be handing out wedding invitations to a few of their most trusted colleagues and close ties. They’re expecting you to make up your mind if you want to attend or not. There’s nothing personal about attending or being a no-show to the wedding…
…except if you skip the wedding last minute after you RSVP’d. Not only is that a waste of money, but that’s downright mean. Tara Winstead cut ties with her friend after being informed that her friend would instead go camping instead of attending the wedding.
A Quick Drive To The ER
A couple of guys were so happy for their best bud that they decided to drink a couple of beers in one of the hotel rooms. They might have consumed one too many, singing a couple of songs and hurling the best man out of a window.
Best believe us. We have received intel from Reddit user DrugsInYoSoup. He used to work at an events center and actually witnessed the poor guy being thrown out of the window. There were no bones fractured – just a scraped knee, a torn suit, and a quick drive to the ER.
Wanting To Be A Queen Too
You should never let anyone dim your light. Dress to impress and be as bold as you can be, except for when you’re the bridesmaid. This is the only time you should let the bride be the sole queen at her wedding.
You could awe everyone with your dress, but don’t wear a tiara or change the color of your gown last minute. Impress everyone by how well you treat your friend, not by how much better you would look if you were the bride.
Peas Of The Same Pod
This best man had been friends with the groom since they were kids. They were pretty much inseparable. And having grown so close the way they did, they knew each other’s strengths and weaknesses. This best man’s weakness was forgetting to put his phone on silent mode.
Come the big day. He hadn’t disappointed. He was shaven and looked dapper, but his phone rang during the vows. He fumbled for it only to see the notification, make sure to put your phone to silent. Sadly, it’s a bit too late for that reminder.
Bringing A Needy Kid To the Event
If you’re a parent and you’ve said yes to the RSVP, consider whether you should bring your kid to the wedding. Don’t wait for the bride and groom to ask you to have someone babysit your kid because there’s no undoing once he throws a tantrum.
Just because everyone was all eyes on the bride, this little kid decided that it was time for him to bawl his eyes out and stomp on the floor. This hadn’t been his first misdemeanor. He had actually done this at the wedding and at a funeral prior.
Thinking That Dancing Is Unmanly
This is every bride’s worst nightmare. The DJ dimmed the lights and played Isn’t She Lovely. Everyone turned to look at the bride’s father, who sat a couple of meters away from her. But instead of offering her his hand, he walked out of the room.
It took the DJ a couple more minutes to understand what was going on. In that small window, the bride shrunk to the floor and then cried her heart out. The DJ put on fast-paced music to drown the sound of her shrill cries.
Not Keeping An Air Of Mystery
So far, everything was going as planned for the newlyweds. None of their guests brought their kids. The wedding started and ended on time. The food was superb, and the music was orchestrated to perfection. There was no reason to panic, right?
Until someone raised a toast. The bride momentarily panicked until she saw that it was their smart, old cousin. Her heart slows down. He congratulated the newlyweds, gave them some marital advice, then informed everyone that should anyone need his services, he was a divorce attorney.
Thinking That The Ship Hasn’t Sailed
This bride and her old flame had remained good friends even after their breakup. She thought of inviting him to the wedding, given that he had helped her cope with a lot of difficulties in her life. He came up to hug her and then whispered in her ear.
Is it too late for a second chance? She could hardly believe what he had said. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings, but she only managed to mutter a curt yes and then returned to welcome the other guests. Sad to say, but that ship has sailed, pal!
Clenched Fists Instead Of Champagne Toasts
We can’t count the number of horror stories that happened on someone’s wedding day because guests drank one too many. Reddit user nolliagkelly has witnessed mass brawls, wrestling matches, and smashed tables. Do people really need that much alcohol to unload?
One guy had even gotten so drunk that he took his girlfriend to dance on the floor and spin-swung her so haphazardly that the woman painted the floor with her makeup. After seeing this exhibition, many guests decided to leave early.
Changing Things Last Minute
Reddit user Spe333 shares some advice for wed-to-bes. Don’t change anything the day of or just before the wedding. Marriage is a life-changing decision. Feeling nervous about it is understandable, but don’t make any other decisions out of raw emotion.
If you decide to change something, calmly think about it, then stick to it. It might be due to harsh weather or an unforeseen accident, but in general, stick to the plan. Both of you only need to say yes to make the wedding successful.
Becoming The Master Of Ceremonies
We understand that a lot of people want to congratulate the newlyweds personally. They may not have time to do it before the wedding, so they might squeeze in a couple of seconds at the reception. Just make sure to keep it short.
The last thing the hosts want is for them to run out of time for events that they’ve got planned. So if you’re going to say a few words, then approach them ahead of time and ask. Otherwise, it might be better to send the newlyweds a card.
Maid of Horror
Let’s face it. There are some family members you’d rather not meet at your wedding. The thought of seeing them a couple of meters away is more than enough to trigger anyone. But that’s still no excuse for losing your calm in public.
The newlyweds regretted inviting the groom’s mother to the wedding. Apparently, she thought it was a good idea to have a tequila drinking contest by the open bar, and afterward, she started hitting on the father of the bride, who was happily married. Talk about a maid of horror!
Hogging Up All The Space To Take Pictures
Having a photographer to take quality shots at the wedding is included in every wedding package. So try not to hog up their space when they’re trying to catch your best angles. Nobody wants a poorly pixelated image of the newlyweds on an iPhone…
They can have it shot on their DSLR. They also know the best places to take the shots in. They would have set up the lights where it would be perfect for you to take your Insta-worthy pics. So give them all the space they need to do their job.
Staying By The Aisles
After many months of preparing, you might be dying to see the beautiful bride in her wedding dress. But don’t stand by the aisle and take a ton of pictures. We have got photographers doing the job for you. They’re paid a substantial amount to do it.
Take one picture if you must, then put your phone away. Give other people behind you the luxury of seeing the bride in her gown. Don’t be the rude photobomber whose back is displayed on all the shots. Return to your seat and enjoy the ceremony.
Expecting The Worst
We look up to our gramps and nanas to give us advice when we need it. After all, they have gone through a lot, and they know a thing or two to share about marriage. But that isn’t a license to get ahead of oneself, sharing what the common causes of divorce are.
It’s a possibility we don’t want to consider at the moment. Besides, we’re the type to exhaust all our resources before caving in. We intend to keep those sacred vows, and we’re also the type to ask for solutions instead of reasons to file for divorce.
Unless the bride chooses a wedding gown of a color other than white, you must not wear a white dress. We can’t count the number of mothers and mothers-in-law who are guilty of this. You’re not getting married. Your daughters are.
Reddit user AllJackedUpOnMtDew took to the internet to vent her frustration with her mother, who had just lost weight. Apparently, her mom thought that was enough reason for her to wear a satin cream floor-length dress, the same color as her bridal gown. Cringe much?
Not In the Mood For A Salad
If you decide to attend the wedding, you’ll also be asked what food you would prefer to be served at the reception. While it may be tempting to choose all options, pick one and stick to it. Don’t expect the caterers to accommodate your dietary needs as you see fit.
Parties are planned months in advance, and chefs only make enough food to cover what the guests had indicated on their invitations. Don’t expect to be seated at a different table where you would prefer salmon over the salad. It just doesn’t work that way.
The Death of A Friendship
This is a story for the books. Reddit user onaan had invited a close friend whom she had known for over a decade. Come the big day, that close friend wore all black with a black veil. You can bet it sent the wrong message.
She might have had a thing for the groom, or she might have thought that this might be the end of a friendship. Well, after that dramatic stunt she pulled, the bride definitely called it quits. Wouldn’t you do the same?
Worship The Ground You Walk On
We get that there are some people who simply crave attention. They would do anything to get people to talk about them, even if it’s on your wedding day. Expect these people to cause drama because even bad publicity stunts will give them their five minutes of fame.
These stunts can be mild, such as doing headstands or recounting an embarrassing story of you in front of the crowd. But some are willing to go to such lengths as getting drunk or throwing sexual remarks at the bride or any of her bridesmaids. That’s a big no-no.
Dismissing The Wedding DJ
When it comes right down to it, DJs are one of the most important people you can count on at the wedding. The music they play can make or break the vibes, and ill-timing can cause the wedding to look disorganized. So be kind to them or else…
Reddit user wyatt99 works as a part-time wedding DJ. He has a long list of do-nots. Do not throw a tantrum if your song is banned. It might be a trigger for the newlyweds. Don’t hound the newlyweds, and don’t do a mic drop unless you’re willing to pay for those suckers.
Untimely Pregnancy Reveal
It may not be a secret to you, but it may be a secret kept by the bride and groom. If they ask you to keep it to yourself, don’t go around raising a toast and asking everyone to take a drink… except for the bride.
If there should be anyone sharing the great news, it should be the newlyweds. We have gone to some weddings where the bride and groom’s families were visibly distraught to find out that the bride had gotten knocked up. Leave them to deal with the drama behind closed doors.